Hey Mr DJ: Head Ballbangers Edition

We’ve had some bitter arguments lately over a vast array of topics.  There’s a wide national controversy over topics as varied as Trump and Russia, Trump and Hollywood sex abuse, Trump and Gold Star Family abuse,  Trump and the NFL, Trump and North Korea, Trump and white supremacy, Trump and Puerto Rico, Trump and health care, Trump and taxes, Trump and Iran, Trump and gun control, Trump and his wife’s stunt double, and Trump’s suspicious silence over the Las Vegas Shooting.

But even though we discuss these issues and more day after day, I don’t let them intrude on my happy place.  See, this is for me as good as it gets, right now.  To me, Heaven and Hell are simply states of being.  More of a state of post-life consciousness than actual places with clouds or fire and shit.  When I die, I hope to enter a perpetual Heaven where it’s always late afternoon on a cool and cloudy Friday in October.  I’m sipping a Fall beer and thinking about which horror film I want to watch as I burn a not-at-all-faggy pumpkin spice candle.  This is my happy place.  And today, you’re all a part of it.

An older happy place of mine, from my early teen years, was staying up late on Saturday nights and watching Headbanger’s Ball on MTV.  Riki Rachtman era, of course.  Who among us aging Gen-Xers can ever forget what MTV once was before rap pushed rock aside and Andy Milokinositosismeccahineyho and pregnant teenagers took over?  It’s an experience that’s gone and can never come back.  It’s dust in the wind.

But you know what?  I admit that I try to capture the spirit of the old Headbanger’s Ball with these DJ threads.  If we can’t have a show that entertains us each week with good music, banter, and humor we can sure as hell make something like it for ourselves.  We’ve done a pretty good job of that over the past few months, haven’t we?

Let’s settle in to this week’s categories.  This week is all about joy and pleasant memories.  And fire and murder.  Because Metal.

  1. Death to All But Metal: Take me back to when Rock Ruled the Earth.  I want Heavy Metal complete with leather, spikes, dragons, war, hairspray, and humiliation at the hands of Dave Mustaine.
  2. Glory Days, Well, They’ll Pass You By: Are there any songs that take you back to a more magical and happier time?  Share your memory with the song, please.
  3. Nope.  Just 1. and 2.  I’m keeping your options limited this week.  Fascism!

Let’s get it on with these dedications.

pfluffy: This is my favorite video of the 20th Century.  There was a period over several months that Young Proto-Thrill would watch Headbanger’s Ball obsessively just to see it. You are most worthy of it as a dedication.  Sweating Bullets by Megadeth

Santino: This one came well after the end of Headbanger’s Ball.  It takes me back to when I had a wonderful night rutting this 8/10 lass on the floor in her house while this video was on.  The part where everything goes green is spectacular in a dark room.  It cuts off a bit early, but the good bits are there. This video is a very close second to pfluffy’s dedication as one of my favorite videos of the time.  Really, the video’s great.  I’m not in love with the song though.  Perfect Drug by NIN.

spootyjim: Another beloved song and video of mine.  The video used to confuse me however.  Is he trying to rape his mother?  What is this?  Whatever it is, it’s dark and it works.  Mother by Danzig.  What do you think, is Danzig the single most divisive figure in Metal?  I’ve never been able to firmly decide if he’s incredibly awesome or a complete tool.  Sometimes I’ll waver between one or the other within the same hour.  Give me some clarity.

WVR:  One of the greats of the Headbanger’s Ball era who never really went as far as they should, IMHO.  This video is probably one of the most visually representative of the show that I can imagine.  It has a Liquid Television vibe also.  Everything is perfect.  Who Was in My Room Last Night? by Butthole Surfers.

Zurvan: Back when I was in high school, I drove with some friends down to the West Bottoms in Kansas City where they have a bunch of “haunted houses”.  You know, old warehouses they set up like fun houses with actors jumping out and scaring the shit out of everyone.  On the way down, we got lost and ended up driving around in circles for a bit.  It was a tremendous adventure, but we made it.  When we left the first haunted house, I the one girl in our group who I had a crush on was good and shaken up and she gave me a big hug and just held on (believe it or not, I used to be quite the white knight).  She ended up becoming my very first serious girlfriend.  And I remember this playing on my crappy car’s cassette player from that night.  Cemetery Gates by Pantera.

Grendel: I used to love this whole album, but I confess it’s far from this band’s best work.  This was one I was banging my head to quite a bit around the time I started working my first job.  Not sure why it sticks out from that time or why I had such a hard-on for this particular album.  Hy Pro Glo by Anthrax.

Next week: Halloween DJ thread with pfluffy!

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13 comments

  1. When I die, I hope to enter a perpetual Heaven where it’s always late afternoon on a cool and cloudy Friday in October.

    Man, you and my wife! I HATE fall. I’ve been in the north all my life and I can’t stand the cold. Fall is when the warm weather is taken from me. Give me a hot humid day, no wind, and sweat beading down my face as I ride my bike. That is heaven.

    It takes me back to when I had a wonderful night rutting this 8/10 lass on the floor in her house while this video was on.

    Okay, I’m not sure what to make of this dedication… Does rutting hurt?

    Well I’ve been in a Tragically Hip mood all week. This is some footage from Much Music (Canada’s version of MTV) of the first time I saw them in concert 25 years ago. I remember taking a cab ride to the park and we got into a station wagon and my friend and I sat in the back, facing the outside. I heard the pssst of a beer bottle being opened, and I turned to him with envy and like the magician he was he pulled out another bottle for me. I also made out with a good friend of mine in the backyard during our pre-drinking session. Young and stoopid!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6o8LcJsvTnI

    My first heavy metal album, Love Gun, was given to me by my cousin (he couldn’t stand Kiss). I listened the hell out of that album. I was obsessed with it to the point that me and 3 friends somehow convinced our Grade 2 teacher that we could paint our faces and perform in front of our school at an assembly. Naturally I was Paul Stanley, with star on face and tennis racket in had I lip-synced my way through this song.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUL_3hdFSEE

    See make-out session above. My friend and I ended up having trysts over the years and for reasons I can’t remember, November Rain became our song. To this day I still get that funny feeling in my tummy when I hear the song.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8SbUC-UaAxE

  2. Does rutting hurt?

    Depends on the couple, I guess. I always try to make it hurt, just enough.

    Another of my favorite October activities is watching scary movies all weekend. Last Saturday night, Thrill Jr and I watched Demon Knight. I have great love for such horror/action/comedies from the 80’s and 90’s.

    Seriously, can you believe that we had a world in which Headbanger’s Ball and Tales from the Crypt existed at the same time? I pity those who didn’t have cable. The awesomeness was too much for mortals.

    Thrill Jr watched the opening with the car chase and explosion and immediately deemed it the best movie ever. He asked me to download this song from that scene for him. The boy is well on his way to greatness.

    Hey Man, Nice Shot by Filter – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9mJ82x_l-E

  3. I remember catching Headbanger’s Ball when I was a kid, but I really wasn’t ready for heavy metal at that point.

    Re: Danzig, “Mother” is literally the only song I’ve ever heard more than once, and I had my own Mandela effect experience when I found out that not only was he still alive but apparently writes “classical” music now. Having said that, I always got a kick out of Grivo on the Kids in the Hall spoofing him.

    Some of what I remember being in heavy rotation when I was a wee lad:

    Rainbow in the Dark – Dio
    We’re Not Going To Take it Anymore – Twisted Sister
    Fight For Your Right – Beastie Boys
    Walk This Way – Run DMC Ft. Aerosmith
    Holy Diver – Dio
    Bring The Noise – Anthrax & Public Enemy

    I recently started buying seasons of Tales From the Crypt when I found out that they were like $10/season. I remember watching them on the weekends having been edited for basic TV, and was curious what had been cut. Not much, surprisingly. The wife never saw the show back in the day, but I got her and the youngest daughter hooked on it now.

  4. I remember catching Headbanger’s Ball when I was a kid, but I really wasn’t ready for heavy metal at that point.

    I can’t remember when I started appreciating it. I might have been about the time Appetite for Destruction came out. I used to blast that album in my room and keep turning the volume down every time there was a cuss word so my stepfather wouldn’t hear it.

    My Michelle by GnR – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=18dBU55S6P0

    Thrill Jr is 7 and he loves metal already. He even asked me last night to put Hy Pro Glo on his Amazon playlist when he overheard me putting the dedication list together. I’m clearly raising a monster.

    apparently writes “classical” music now.

    Dafuq? I was not aware of this.

    We’re Not Going To Take it Anymore – Twisted Sister

    Oh, man! You even got the video with the Lt. Nedermeyer guy! You’re the KING.

    This is my favorite Twisted Sister tune. Kind of spoiled by appearing in the Pee Wee Herman movie, but still fantastic.

    Burn in Hell – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_atqPcXvcr0

    I recently started buying seasons of Tales From the Crypt when I found out that they were like $10/season.

    Nice. I might have to start going back through those again after finishing the new seasons of Stranger Things and Stan Against Evil.

  5. This one came out just after my divorce from my first husband. I was free and clear of a weird rebound relationship and on my own with the world ahead of me. It turned out great and I got to see the world and settle down properly. The 90’s presented a bit of a side trip, but they were their own brand of awesomeness. This song takes me back to that “ok, now don’t fuck it up” moment in time, after which I proceeded to fuck it up, but it all worked out in the end.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B_3TlrZLpQ0

  10. Who says it’s just a memory?

    Oh my God…The promo for My Demon Lover in that episode. I’m watching that movie before the weekend ends. I vow it.

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