Yes, the blog’s format is fucked up.

No, it’s not zoom’s fault.

Yes, it’s my fault.

Shut up.

Today, supposedly, is the day that the GOP’s long-awaited-and-totally-not-overhyped-serious-you-guys House Intelligence Committee FISA Abuse Memo is to be released.  I prepared this post last night, so forgive me if this is already out of date.  Unlike Congressman Nunes, I dont get to revise my published materials after the benefit of review by the FBI.  Although I have reason to believe that the FBI is shocked whenever they look at my browsing history.

Truth be told, I’m wondering just how over-hyped this FISA Memo really is.  The Democrats and the Media have been as crazed over it as the Republicans have been dramatic about its meaning.   It’s so similar to the aftermath of the Wikileaks DNC/Podesta releases that by the end of the day I’m half-expecting CNN to warn everyone that it’s illegal to read the memo.

Let’s put the tinfoil hats on for a moment.  Maybe Schiff is freaking out so he can help fan the flames so that when it turns out to be a dud, Nunes will look worse?  The plan is so elaborate, that they even got McCabe to walk off the job 12 hours after Wray read the memo to make it more believable and then leaked out rumors that Wray would quit if it was released.  IT’S THAT ELABORATE.

I don’t get the outrage over the FISA Memo.  What Nunes and company are doing is within Congress’s oversight role.  The process they’ve followed is sure as hell more responsible than the leaks from the intelligence and law enforcement bureacracy over the past two Republican presidential administrations that really did expose intelligence programs and methods.

Am I supposed to feel sorry for the DOJ and FBI now that they’re complaining about the FISA Memo and the public learning that they haven’t been applying it ethically or even legally and some of their careers are going to get wrecked?  Well, I don’t.  If the memo doesn’t bring them down for any misdeeds they may have committed, I hope the IG report does.  In any event, they brought a collusion investigation against the Trump Administration that they know is bullshit and relentlessly leaked about it to the press for over a year.  They’ve also refused to provide Congress with information that it has subpoenaed and claimed that they lost evidence they knew was recoverable.

I hope Trump laughed right in their stupid, fat Federale faces when they begged him not to release the memo.  They answer to me, as a voter (theoretically), and they are subject to Congressional oversight (reality).  Any potential damage that this memo might cause is worth it to me as long as they are pointedly reminded of their place.  Arrogant fucks.  Let the chips fall where they may.

Ah, but this is a music post, isn’t it?  Sorry.  I wanted to write something about the memo but couldn’t get to it until this was due.  So I decided to merge the two.  If you want to argue about it in the comments, feel free, but post a song or something.  Or don’t.  I don’t care.

So what are some good categories for the unfolding drama?

  1. Don’t Believe the Hype – Stuff that failed to measure up to expectations.  Shitty songs by people who were maybe the children of talented artists or artists who were good at other things and decided to try out music as an act of hubris.  I’m especially interested in songs from albums by established musicians that were highly anticipated and badly received.
  2. (Expletive Deleted) – Radio edits of songs or those that just beep stuff out for comedic effect.  I’d be surprised if there’s no redaction in the memo, so let’s take the punch out of the music too.
  3. ‘Cause the Lie Becomes the Truth – Songs of gossip, rumor, innuendo, scandal, sleaze, false accusations, and even truths that people don’t believe.

Breakthrough Bonus: Get me music videos with people crashing through walls, Kool Aid Man style.  There has to be some metal song where the band does that. Whoever posts the most of these will receive a special recognition next week.  Totally worth it, honestly.  What, you don’t believe me?  Are you trying to cause a Constitutional crisis, mother(expletive deleted)?

First, enjoy a movie clip of what happens when Deep State guys go bad.

Here are the dedications.  I know you’ve been eagerly awaiting this all week!

Aren’t you clever!: I knew you’d laugh at this selection and I think you remember why.  Was any album in history more anticipated than Chinese Democracy and more widely shat upon?  Shackler’s Revenge by Guns N’ Roses.

Redacted, bitch: I purchased this song a couple of months ago.  It used to be on the radio all the time.  I made the mistake of buying the “album version” and confess that I did not know how heavily censored it was.  It’s better that way.   Battleflag by Lo Fidelity Allstars.

Nope, try again: Courtney Love never would have been famous if not for who she married.  Take that, talented and hardworking women everywhere.  Malibu by Hole.

 Covfeve : The Joshua Tree.  Rattle and Hum.  Achtung, Baby.  And then (expletive deleted) Zooropa?  Numb by U2.

Santino (I can only unmask foreigners): This song takes me back to when I was in high school and worked at a car wash, near a truck stop.  I had my drink from McDonald’s sitting next to me after I got done eating while I was vacuuming a car out.  Anyway, I didn’t realize that a bee crawled down my straw.  So when I next drank from the straw, I ended up sucking up the bee and it went down my throat.  I freaked out and told the other guy I was working with, “I just ate a bee!  Oh, my God!”.  He laughed and I wanted to throw the drink all over his face.  So I ran inside to where the first aid kit was, behind the office, and found a bee sting kit.  Ironically, it said “For External Use Only” on the package.  Thankfully, I didn’t get stung in my mouth or throat as I swallowed it.  To this day, I always check for bees before  sucking on a straw in a drink that’s been sitting outside.  Live and learn.  I’m glad that this story has finally come out.

Speaking of youthful mishaps that sucked, here’s Jaden Smith.

:0 <===8 : I’m going to say it, no matter who gets mad.  After the greatness of Badmotorfinger and Superunknown, I found Down on the Upside to be a complete disappointment.  Never Named by Soundgarden.

Next week is a Very Special DJ Thread.  Get in here to receive your invitation.

24 comments

  1. Yes, the blog’s format is fucked up.

    Geez, I was wonderin’ ’bout that.

    Shut up.

    Oh, sorry, never mind.

    redacted

    LOLZ!!!!! One of your more brilliant posts. Thanks for a good start to Friday!

  2. Your redactions look like some of the “birther” certificates I saw back in the day. About as effective too.

    I’m especially interested in songs from albums by established musicians that were highly anticipated and badly received.

    I agree on Zooropa (except that I surprisingly love Numb). Keeping on the U2 Theme, you can pick just about anything from Songs of Innocence as well. What a disappointment.

    Breakthrough Bonus: Get me music videos with people crashing through walls, Kool Aid Man style. There has to be some metal song where the band does that.

    How about bonus points for the band and Arya fricking Stark crashing through multiple walls? The Vamps – Rest Your Love (@2:50 to watch the wall crashing commence)

  3. The Vamps – Rest Your Love (@2:50 to watch the wall crashing commence)

    Perfect! I wasn’t expecting Arya Stark either.

  4. Super-Bonus with a touch of #3 – How about a song drummed by a guy who went through a brick wall in a car, losing his left arm in the process, and still managed to be one of the best drummers of all time? Def Leppard – Hysteria

  5. Alright, here’s the memo. Make up your own minds.

    Meh. Your sucking a bee through a straw story is much better.

  6. Meh. Your sucking a bee through a straw story is much better.

    Agh! My classified memo, hacked from overseas! How could this have happened?

  7. A DEVO cover of Secret Agent Man was nowhere near as cool as I thought it would be. Despite the general awfulness of this I watched it all hoping that something would crash through the set for the bonus but alas, no. Does two guys with ape masks and gym shorts spanking their mom count?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQjwUyne3kQ

  8. Don’t quit your day job:

    Oh my God…

    That was exactly the sort of thing I was hoping to see for a #1. You are the master.

  9. DEVO cover of Secret Agent Man

    That was painful. I’d look for a WordPress plugin to censor that video from this blog forever, but I’m afraid I’d break the blog even worse.

  10. More breaking shit:

    Soil – Halo (Flophouse)
    Korn – Freak on a Leash (Everything)
    Slipknot – Duality (Patio Door)
    Foo Fighters – Everlong (Front Door)
    Beastie Boys – (You Gotta) Fight For Your Right (To Party) (Front Door)
    Beastie Boys – Sabotage (Apartment Door)
    Beastie Boys – Intergalactic (Tokyo)

    Goddamn, the Beastie Boys had some seriously fantastic videos back in the day.

    Hype:

    Weezer – El Scorcho. I remember how reviled Pinkerton was when it originally dropped. The band literally spent years apologizing for it, but over time it’s come to be seen as one of their best efforts.
    Radiohead – Pyramid Song. OK Computer was one of the seminal albums for me and my circle of friends. So when Amnesiac came out it was a real head scratcher.

    Redacted:
    Limp Bizkit – Break Stuff. I think about half of this song is edited out for radio play.
    Buckcherry – Cocaine. When this song came out MTV edited out all of the drug references. It was so mangled a friend of mine thought the version he heard on the radio was by an entirely different band.
    Monster Magnet – Space Lord. This caught me totally by surprise back in the day.
    Escape the Fate – One For The Money. Wow, that’s surprisingly radio unfriendly.
    Nine Inch Nails – Closer. No explanation necessary. The wife wouldn’t let me request this at our wedding reception. Of course I wasn’t dedicating it to her, so I suppose she was justified.
    The Prodigy – Smack My Bitch Up. I remember an unholy shitstorm over this, but since the song stinks on ice I didn’t pay a ton of attention at the time.
    2 Live Crew – Me So Horny. Unleashed the ravenous monster Tipper Gore.

  11. W00! I was on a 90s nu metal kick yesterday and ended up falling all the way down the rabbit hole.

    Everybody shits on the genre now, but at the time the 1st wave bands were doing some really interesting stuff .

  12. W00! I was on a 90s nu metal kick yesterday and ended up falling all the way down the rabbit hole.

    I get that way sometimes. Get caught in the moment of the pre-9/11 era, which was so much less bizarre. Comfort music (hey, future DJ thread theme!).

    Hype

    Turn Me On, Mr Deadman by Union Underground – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-WehSAYGxk

    Here’s one that kind of sums up how I feel lately, keeping up with the news.

    What a Day by Nonpoint – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSajjsER8iQ

    This band was underrated.

    Kill Control by Skrape – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQ4QVgpv6S0

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